Mom Life Tuesday

Last week was the beginning of a new school year for my kids. As always we made our last-minute runs regarding school supplies, clothes, shoes, and groceries (all my kids take a packed lunch from home) in preparation for the upcoming week. This year the teenagers wanted to shop with dad which was actually a blessing for me because I know for a fact my 13-year-old wouldn’t try to push the limits of the dress code restriction we both set of not wearing spaghetti strap shirts or crop tops until the age of 16. It’s more of a right of passage that pays homage to her two older sisters who also had to follow the same rule. The Sunday before school I was driving my 17-year-old to work when I noticed her mood was a bit somber. Worried it was something at work or possibly something that happened with one of her friends I asked her what was up. Of course, my 7-year-old son, who is my shadow, was also in the car accompanying me on the ride to and fro. She goes on to vent her frustrations about how she isn’t excited to go back to school because over the summer she got used to working full time because of having an open schedule and now that school is starting she has to go back to “weak paychecks” because she isn’t allowed to work past 9:30 on school nights. She’s not required to pay any bills other than transferring 10% of her gross income for the duration of her paycheck into her savings account which is a way to teach her the habit of always saving money, because frankly the way she spends it scared me quite a bit. In fact her ability to buy whatever she wants whenever she wants over the summer, anyone would understand why she was a little upset.  She continued on her cute little rant complaining about how her day is now wasted taking classes she doesn’t want to take and aside from seeing her friends, she’s not thrilled at the idea of being in school when she could be earning money. She told me she wanted to look into programs that could possibly shorten her day so she can have the opportunity to work more. When it comes to education both her father and I are pretty lenient as long as grades are up and they complete whatever criteria are required in order for them to move on to the next grade and graduate without delay. In fact, we tell them all the time being an adult isn’t so much about how you do it just as long as you figure out a responsible and honest way to get things done. I let her go on because she’s the type of individual who sometimes just needs to vent her thoughts and feelings out loud, not necessarily for advice or guidance but just to be heard and occasionally validated. She ranted for about a good 10 minutes both of us had completely forgotten about her little brother being in the car because he typically asks for the DVD to be turned on and turned up but on this ride, he didn’t. I’d say a good 30 seconds after she was done my son out of nowhere chimes in and says, “Well, I don’t want to go to school either but I still have to go and be there even though I don’t even want to,” in his stern voice he usually makes when he’s being serious and trying to get a point across. I had no idea he even felt that way because last year he loved going to school so much that he was actually a little upset he wouldn’t be able to go over the two months of summer vacation. I looked at him through this little mirror in my van that allows me to see all the passengers behind me and he had his eyebrows scrunched together and was sincerely upset if not a bit angry. I  didn’t know what to say or how to respond to him besides validating his thoughts and feelings with my typical “is that so” response I make when I don’t know what exactly to say but don’t want him to feel ignored when he catches me off guard, which happens quite often. His sister smirked and told him it gets worse when he gets to middle and high school. They both sat there in silence for the rest of the ride processing their emotions I guess. Once I was able to compose myself enough not to laugh out loud I assured both of them it was going to be ok and once they got back into the swing of their new routine and after meeting up with old friends and even making new ones they’ll both feel a little better and will enjoy school again. Neither of them agreed and looked at me with their cute little grumpy faces because neither of them was trying to hear it. Needless to say, the first day was great for both of them and so far they haven’t complained about school since. Mom Life.